I've been starting to dwell on a few topics that I might want to share in this new blog and settled on this one: the preciousness of life. This past year has been both a year of tragedy and death, but also one of hope, renewal, and new life. I was reminded of both this past weekend when Zachary had a scary run in with a pool. Let me give you a little background of Zach before I explain. Zach is a very sweet, loving, smart, energetic, and curious soul. However, he tends to always find the most dangerous thing to do in his surroundings and try it out. This can range from climbing on the edge of railings above stairs, jumping from high places, dunking himself time after time in a pool without trying to come up for air...you get the point. This past weekend we were at a bonfire and the kids were running around the yard in the dark. The people whose house we were at have a pool. Well Zachary started crying and we couldn't see him. Then someone spotted a figure at the top of the stairs to the pool, and of course it was Zach. He had climbed up the stairs and had actually stepped up onto the pool blanket and was starting to sink. By the time someone got there the water was about up to his knees. Needless to say he was very scared, and so was everyone else there. We pray for God's protection and I think we definitely got it that night! What could have been something unthinkable (I'm
really trying not to think about it), helped me to be appreciative of my boys and how God has blessed us with them, and hopefully it put a little fear into my previously fearless boy.
So since that evening I have been thinking about this theme of our year...the preciousness of life. This year we lost some dear friends and family, such as our good friend, Bonnie, my grandmother, Ruth, a family member recently had a miscarriage, and two couples that we're friends with tragically lost babies as well. Cancer has also been something that has shaken up a lot of people we know, unfortunately, and two friends' children were diagnosed with a terrible, terminal genetic disease. It is so easy to dwell on the negatives, to blame someone or God, to be bitter or angry. But what's amazing is that most everyone listed above who have been affected by these tragedies and hardships have all been unbelievable witnesses of God's grace, mercy, strength, and love. They have all continued to point to God, praising Him, despite their pain and loss. So these friends have taught me a lot about appreciating life and seeing in color how precious it is.
On a positive note, we have also been blessed with new life. After trying for almost six months (I know, this is
nothing compared to the struggles of a lot of people we know trying to conceive), God blessed us with another child. With other pregnancies we haven't had any problems conceiving, but this time seemed much longer. This small wait alone also helped me to put into perspective and empathize how others feel as they wait month after month to hear the words that they are pregnant. But since I've been pregnant I've been more uneasy and anxious. Just today I had my 16 week appointment and I was nervous when the nurse tried to find the heartbeat because of this uneasiness I've felt. She did find it, by the way, thankfully! With Jacob and Zach I was in la la land, thinking everything would be fine, not worrying, etc. That is great, but I sort of feel like because of this past year and the sad things that have happened around us, that it will happen to me, too. I know this is so silly, because in my mind I know that I should trust God and trust in his will for my life, and I do trust Him, but it's still been hard. It will be so nice to "see" the baby in a month and to know that he or she is healthy. I've been preoccupied with "what sex will it be??", but really I know what's really important is for it be healthy, girl or boy! :) But anyways, I am much more appreciative of this blessing of new life this time around, and unfortunately it took some loss and heartache to do this.
