"When God Messes Up Your Plans"

The title of this blog today was the title of a message that the pastor of our church, Pastor Joe, gave to my MOPS group in December. At the time, I could think of a few ways that God has had different plans for us than what we had imagined, but the past couple weeks have definitely fallen into that category. Joe spoke about how God sometimes tries to get our attention in changing our plans and that sometimes he changes them because he has a better plan for us that could be bigger, better, broader, and more rewarding.

If you haven't heard, I started having contractions on Christmas Eve that started to become pretty regular. I was having them every couple hours, so about 8-10 a day, that were not stopping. I went in to see my ob the Monday after Christmas and found out that, yes, I was in fact experiencing preterm labor at 32 weeks. I thought they might say that I was having Braxton Hicks contractions, but no, they were real. I was put on bedrest until that Thursday when I would go back and get rechecked. That Thursday I hadn't progressed any further, but was still on bedrest to make sure that it didn't get worse. I had an ultrasound that day and Molly is doing very well, thankfully, and is already about 5 pounds, which is great. I was supposed to go back a week later, but ended back in the office a day earlier than that, this past Wednesday, because out of the blue I began having them every 10 minutes. This lasted for about 2 hours. So again I went in and I had progressed a little bit, but not a lot, which was good. I was put on the medicine that slows down labor (nifedipine) and I'll be on that for a few weeks probably and of course, I'll still be on bedrest. I go back this Thursday for another checkup, so I'll ask at what point will they take me off the meds and let me go into labor in my own timing.

So here's what OUR plans were... The month of December we decided we were just going to focus on getting ready for Christmas, the hustle and bustle of everything, and also preparing our hearts for it in celebrating Advent. I didn't have the energy to do much of anything else, since I really started to drag in December. This pregnancy has been tougher than the other 2--which my father in law reminded me that I am older this time....thanks Gaylord! :) 30 is so old... :) So we hadn't done anything to get ready for Baby Molly because we were going to start the process right after Christmas, since according to our plans we still had 8 weeks to go. We still had to put up a bunk bed, get Zach moved into Jacob's room, get the crib put back up, turn Molly's room in a baby's room again, and a GIRLY one, of course, along with many other preparations that need to be done. Then on Christmas Eve the contractions started. Our plans have definitely been changed!

Dan has been able to purchase and put up the bunk bed, along with the crib, but we still have quite a bit to do. All our baby stuff is in storage in my in laws basement, we still have to buy another dresser for the boys' room, I haven't bought anything for her yet, like even a coming home outfit...oh the list could go on and on. My nesting instincts have not turned off in bedrest!

But getting back to Pastor Joe's message...I trust that God's plan is the best plan for us, and if that means being forced to rest (which is tough for me, I will admit) and maybe having an early baby without being fully "prepared," I know I need to be content in that. I don't feel like I had done anything too different this time around, but I probably should have kept in mind that having 2 other children to take care of is enough to rest more. So...resting is now my job! Resting has always been tough for me. I always feel the need to get something done, to keep busy. Dan doesn't understand this, but it's just me, I guess. The first week of my bedrest I finally put together our first family photo book (shutterfly, not scrapbook) and planned Jacob's 5th birthday party. :) Lesson #1 from God--enjoy the rest without feeling the need to "get something done!"

Lesson #2--Be able to accept help from others and not feel bad or guilty about it. So far in the last 2 weeks we have needed someone to be with me every day because if left to myself I will do way too much just in order to take care of the boys. This will probably continue until I have the baby. My mom and mother in law have been wonderful, and a few other friends and family members (thanks Andy and Malissa, and Sue and Casey!) have also stepped up in helping with them and also in cleaning and doing laundry, which has been awesome. I hadn't deep cleaned in a while before this all started either, because of course my plan was to do it after Christmas, so the cleaning help has been much appreciated! :) I should have mentioned Dan first, because he's the glue keeping us all together. I know he just wants to get some rest himself when he gets home from work, but he's taking care of the boys when he's home, giving baths, making or preparing meals, cleaning up all the toys and the kitchen....the list could go on. Also, a few friends and our parents have brought us meals, which has been awesome. At first Dan was like, hey I can cook, too, but just having one less thing to worry about has been a blessing. So I'm learning to be thankful for any help and not feel guilty. In time I'll be able to help someone else out in this situation. :)

I know I haven't blogged in quite a while, although I have 2 drafts that I never finished... :) So I'm going to be posting a few things to catch up on what I wanted to post but just never got around doing. :)

Thanks, everyone! Please keep us in your prayers! Pray that Molly will stay put for a couple more weeks at least, for my health, for the boys, and for Dan (his sanity, most of all!). Love you!